Just What We Need: More Bat-Shit Christian Righties on the Bench
Well it only took about 24 hours, but the underlying reasons - the scheme if you will - for Bush's nomination to the most important Court of law in the nation has now been uncovered.
Just like your annoying sister in law who refused to go to your gay uncle's Christmas party because "Ron" would be there, and just like your unemployed housewife neighbor who bakes the best damn Rice Kris pie squares for PTA meetings to try to get your local school to stop teaching evolution and other heathen sciences - and oh yes, just like our recovering alcoholic president - Harriet Miers is a born again Christian.
Did you REALLY expect any other qualifier for this nomination?
No one has any clue about her judicial record because, well, she's never really done the whole judge thing before.
But she is a friend of the president – in fact, she’s his lawyer, which is sort of like nominating your dentist for a Nobel Prize in medicine. She has been Bush’s general counsel to both his gubernatorial campaigns and his pick to lead the Texas Lottery Commission, and remember, in this White House loyalty counts, and performance absolutely does not.
In fact, the poorer the performance, the higher the reward.
Just ask Condi.
Just ask George Tenent.
Just ask Wolfowitz.
Just ask John Bolton.
Just ask Brownie.
At first I thought many Republicans would actually be outraged at the fact that some Democrats might want to participate in scrutinizing the most important appointments a President can make – but it’s the Republicans, NOT the Democrats who have been making headlines in their apprehension, if not outright concern about placing this woman on the bench.
"There are a lot more people -- men, women and minorities -- that are more qualified in my opinion by their experience than she is," says Trent Lott.
"There's precious little to go on and a deep concern that this would be a Souter-type candidate," said Republican Senator Sam Brownback, (R-KS) from the capitol of the flyover states, perhaps indicating his fear that Miers will turn out to be a black, lesbian, flag-burning Jew.
Even the suspiciously gay-looking head of the Rapture-Right, James Dobson is looking for God to speak to him, among other schizophrenic symptoms, about the political appointment…because everyone knows, God is a HUGE political junkie and really has nothing better to do (well other than to guide field goal attempts from college football kickers’ feet through uprights each Saturday afternoon).
However, Republicans are truly split on the issue, which in and of itself has made headline since they tend to collaborate on everything (all except for the red-headed step children in Maine, Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe), all the time without exception because they’re like sheep on Special K following the sheepdog back into the barn.
All I can say is this. Get your coat hangers ready and the food stamps on standby ladies, because Planned Parenthood’s days of allowing you reproductive sovereignty –at least as it is protected by federal law – are numbered.
Just like your annoying sister in law who refused to go to your gay uncle's Christmas party because "Ron" would be there, and just like your unemployed housewife neighbor who bakes the best damn Rice Kris pie squares for PTA meetings to try to get your local school to stop teaching evolution and other heathen sciences - and oh yes, just like our recovering alcoholic president - Harriet Miers is a born again Christian.
Did you REALLY expect any other qualifier for this nomination?
No one has any clue about her judicial record because, well, she's never really done the whole judge thing before.
But she is a friend of the president – in fact, she’s his lawyer, which is sort of like nominating your dentist for a Nobel Prize in medicine. She has been Bush’s general counsel to both his gubernatorial campaigns and his pick to lead the Texas Lottery Commission, and remember, in this White House loyalty counts, and performance absolutely does not.
In fact, the poorer the performance, the higher the reward.
Just ask Condi.
Just ask George Tenent.
Just ask Wolfowitz.
Just ask John Bolton.
Just ask Brownie.
At first I thought many Republicans would actually be outraged at the fact that some Democrats might want to participate in scrutinizing the most important appointments a President can make – but it’s the Republicans, NOT the Democrats who have been making headlines in their apprehension, if not outright concern about placing this woman on the bench.
"There are a lot more people -- men, women and minorities -- that are more qualified in my opinion by their experience than she is," says Trent Lott.
"There's precious little to go on and a deep concern that this would be a Souter-type candidate," said Republican Senator Sam Brownback, (R-KS) from the capitol of the flyover states, perhaps indicating his fear that Miers will turn out to be a black, lesbian, flag-burning Jew.
Even the suspiciously gay-looking head of the Rapture-Right, James Dobson is looking for God to speak to him, among other schizophrenic symptoms, about the political appointment…because everyone knows, God is a HUGE political junkie and really has nothing better to do (well other than to guide field goal attempts from college football kickers’ feet through uprights each Saturday afternoon).
However, Republicans are truly split on the issue, which in and of itself has made headline since they tend to collaborate on everything (all except for the red-headed step children in Maine, Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe), all the time without exception because they’re like sheep on Special K following the sheepdog back into the barn.
All I can say is this. Get your coat hangers ready and the food stamps on standby ladies, because Planned Parenthood’s days of allowing you reproductive sovereignty –at least as it is protected by federal law – are numbered.
posted by Jeremy at 8:29 PM
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